


Lost In Space

by destroya_ah_ah



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Break Up, Gen, Monologue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-19
Updated: 2013-02-19
Packaged: 2017-11-29 21:38:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/691736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destroya_ah_ah/pseuds/destroya_ah_ah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s been four months since we ended it. It’s been almost that long since you started dating her...you’d been swept off your feet and taken away – a knight to her princess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost In Space

**Author's Note:**

> Gerard's POV.
> 
> It's been a day full of feelings, so I decided to make use of it all and write something. I don't normally write fics involving break-ups, etc, but trying new things doesn't hurt, I guess.

 

 

It’s been four months since we ended it. It’s been almost that long since you started dating _her_. You were so quick to move on; I was in the quicksand. I’d be shouting for you to pull me out of the mess I was in but, of course, you’d been swept off your feet and taken away – a knight to her princess.

 

We used to be knights together. Knights by day, battling the world. Knights by night, battling the darkness. That darkness consumes me now. I’m back to my old ways, broken and helpless and dependent. You were my addiction. You replaced everything that would damage me and the cloud above my head disappeared. Now I realise that the sun you brought was an artificial light, and the cloud hadn’t disappeared; it’d just stopped raining for a while. The rain’s back though – heavier than ever. I’m ankle-deep in the flood already but now I can’t borrow your shoes while mine are drying.

 

All I hope is that it’s not the same. I hope she’s not the same as me and I hope nothing will ever be the same for you. It’ll never be the same for me either; that way everyone loses.

 

She doesn’t know you like I do, and I hope she never does. She doesn’t know all the details that make you so unique. Of course, the surface is obvious, with your eyes and your stance and your tattoos. She won’t ever know the truth I saw in your hazel eyes when you spoke every word to me. She won’t know you gave up on trying to be taller, so you slouch even further into gravity’s tug. She’ll only see the decorations on your skin; she won’t ever see what is actually there underneath – the birthmark on your right calf, the skateboarding scar on your left knee, the barely-there stretch marks at the tops of your thighs from the chub you gained one summer, the tendons and muscles in each of your arms, the shoulder that got dislocated, the spot on your neck where you like getting bitten.

 

If you were Earth, I’d have visited all your landmarks on a round-the-world trip, only to be replaced by another visitor and then remembering that I had a home planet to get back to…but there is no one else. There isn’t a home planet awaiting my return. You weren’t some jolly, three-year vacation. You were _my life_ and now I’m lost in space, hoping I’ll hit an asteroid belt somewhere and get mutilated into oblivion.

 

I never thought I’d see another day where I woke up with the world’s worst hangover, hoping that I’d be caught up in some tragic accident and not have to waste time and energy in forcing death upon myself. With you, I never thought I’d see that day, but here I am again, back at square one.

 

I hope she makes you happy; I’d never wish these feelings to be felt by anyone in this universe. I hope you spend the rest of your lives with each other, maybe raise a family together. Most of all though, I hope you realise, one day, how broken I am without you.


End file.
